Flieber Dog Playpen

Dad

You didn't look thrilled when I brought this home. First impressions?

Boldo

It smelled like plastic and broken promises. Also like a warehouse, which is worse. I thought maybe you were finally giving up on me and just wanted to contain the problem. Then I realized you were just trying to keep me out of the kitchen when you cook. That's fair.

Dad

Tell me about the texture. I know you have opinions about texture.

Boldo

The mesh panels are cheap-feeling. Thin. My teeth could probably go through it if I really wanted to, but I don't, so that's not the point. The metal frame is cold and tastes like nothing, which is disappointing. The whole thing has that new-plastic smell that doesn't go away for two weeks. Not great.

Dad

So it's been a few days. Have your feelings changed at all?

Boldo

Fine. I'll admit it doesn't move when I lie against it. The floor panels keep my joints off the cold tile. And you've been putting my bed in there, which means it smells like me now instead of a factory. Is that a treat smell coming from the kitchen? Did you open a new jar? I'm getting up.

Dad

The cat got one of these too. I'm curious what you make of that.

Boldo

That's insulting. The cat's is the same size as mine, which means you think we're equivalent. We are not. The cat actually likes hers because it fits perfectly under the stairs where she can judge everyone. Mine is in the middle of the room like I'm a piece of furniture. But I've noticed she can't reach me through the mesh, which is strategically excellent.

Dad

Bottom line — poo emojis. How many?

Boldo

Four. It's functional and stable and doesn't smell terrible after the first week. It doesn't collapse like those fabric ones you almost bought. The mesh is strong enough. I'm not thrilled about my containment, but the thing works. You didn't waste all the money on this one.