Royal Canin Adult Dry Dog Food

Dad

You didn't look thrilled when I brought this home. First impressions?

Boldo

The bag smells like chicken meal and minerals. Efficient. Cold. I ate it because I'm not an idiot, but I wasn't going to pretend it was something it isn't. You spent money on this because it has a fancy name and a French pedigree, didn't you?

Dad

Tell me about the texture. I know you have opinions about texture.

Boldo

Small kibble. Almost too small. They dissolve too fast on my tongue, which is annoying because I like to work through a bite. It's consistent, I'll give it that. But it feels like eating pebbles that someone pre-softened. Where are the treats, by the way? I smell something in the kitchen.

Dad

So it's been a few days. Have your feelings changed at all?

Boldo

Not really. My stomach feels fine. That's something. The smell hasn't gotten any more interesting, which is the real problem here. Every meal smells identical to the last one. There's no anticipation. It's reliable and boring, which I guess is the point.

Dad

The cat got one of these too. I'm curious what you make of that.

Boldo

She got it too? That's... fine, actually. At least you're not favoring her. Though she knocked hers around for ten minutes before eating it like some kind of princess. She's over by the water bowl now. Not drinking. Just sitting. I don't trust that.

Dad

Bottom line — poo emojis. How many?

Boldo

Four. It does exactly what it's supposed to do. My coat looks fine. I'm not bloated. The bag lasts a reasonable amount of time. I'm not thrilled, but I'm not complaining either. It's competent. That's the review.