Yeowww! Organic Catnip Banana

Dad

Okay, I bought this. You were there when I opened the box. What did you think?

Boldo

I smelled it before you even got the tape off. That catnip smell hit me like someone opened a bag of concentrated regret. The banana itself is weird — soft, floppy, bright yellow. Not threatening. But then the cat showed up and suddenly it was her prized possession and I wasn't allowed near it. Classic.

Dad

Let's talk about the smell. I know that's your main thing.

Boldo

The smell is aggressive. Organic catnip, which apparently means it's fancy and more potent. It's pungent in a way that made me follow the cat around the house for two days. Not because I wanted it — because my nose had no choice. It's strong enough that I could find it in a dark room with my eyes closed. Which I did. Twice.

Dad

You've had some time with it now. Is it any good?

Boldo

For a cat? Yeah, it's good. She won't put it down. She throws it, chases it, attacks it, then lies on top of it like it's made of gold. It's held up fine — no rips, no leaking. The texture is sturdy but still satisfying to bat around, I guess. Speaking of which, is there any chance you have treats in the kitchen right now? I smell something in there that might be more interesting than this banana thing.

Dad

I paid about $8 for this. Be honest. Worth it?

Boldo

For a cat toy that costs eight dollars and provides her with approximately seventeen hours of obsessive entertainment? Fine. Yeah. It's worth it. The catnip doesn't seem to wear off. She's still acting like it just arrived. I hate admitting this, but my peace and quiet has been better because she's occupied with the banana instead of knocking over the water bowl at 3 AM.

Dad

Final answer. Would you recommend this to other dogs?

Boldo

No. This is not a dog product. It's a cat product. But if you have a cat that's boring and you want her to develop an addiction to something organic and non-toxic, then yeah, tell people to buy it. Your cat will become insufferable about it. Which is how you'll know it works. The only reason I'm not giving this a five is because it smells like cat satisfaction and that bothers me philosophically.